We have created the following list of online dating tips and advice about cyber-dating from doing extensive research, talking to other online daters as well as from our own personal dating experiences. They cover the technicalities as well as the more elusive romantic aspects of looking for love online. And then there’s common sense, which everyone who has ever tried Internet dating soon finds is not so common. As with most advice, there is much more of it than you probably asked for, so pick and choose among the following tips that may work for you.

When choosing a web site to sign up on:

Go for the dating web sites with the most members. The larger sites provide more chances to meet compatible partners.

Research your potential dating sites and choose one that has the features you will enjoy using most, like chat or instant messaging. Choose a site you will make the most of. Chances are the same site will attract someone who has tastes similar to your own.

If you have certain values you seek in a partner above all else, say, they must share your religious, family or lifestyle choices; seek web sites that emphasize these values. For example, if you must date only people of the same religion, check out dating sites for say, Christians, Jews or Muslims. They do exist. Again, if there are several to choose from, pick those that have the largest membership or that are the most specific to your needs.

Sign up for the longer-term membership. One month may be the cheapest membership but you will probably end up paying for another, so get the 3-month or longer plan and take your time to look around.

When writing about yourself in your profile:

Be creative and as witty as possible when coming up with a username and a headline for your dating profile. Be eye-catching, and if you don’t feel you can do that, just be very honest about yourself and what you are looking for in a relationship.

Be honest, be honest, and be honest. Any lies you tell to make yourself sound better than you are (whatever that is) will surely come out in the first face-to-face meeting. Don’t put yourself or your date through that kind of embarrassment; nobody needs it.

Don’t only describe yourself with single words. You are not a grocery list. Write detailed descriptions of what you like, tell (brief) stories about yourself, and make your answers personal.

On the other hand, beware of going on and on too much, and the TMI (Too Much Information) syndrome. Keep it light and upbeat. Don’t talk about old relationships. Be confident about yourself above all.

Check your spelling and grammar. There is nothing more unappealing than unnecessary ignorance. Use that button on your computer: Tools - Spelling and Grammar – then Change or Ignore as you wish. Spell Check is not always right, so after you compose your profile re-read it two or three times before uploading it into your online dating website.

Post pictures of yourself; choose recent ones that actually look like you. Include close-ups and full body shots so people can really see what you look like. If you do not post a picture you are reducing your chances drastically. Most people assume that, if you don’t post a picture you have something to hide. No matter how you judge your own looks, there are people out there with all kinds of tastes, and they may think you look better than you think you look, so give them a chance to find you.

When communicating with potential dates:

Be safe; that is what DateCop is all about. As well as using the database and resources here, there are many simple ways to protect yourself from the wackos out there, and they are out there. But do not despair, there are many nice men and women searching online for someone like you.

Get a free email address from one of the sites such as hotmail or yahoo. Use these anonymous email addresses, rather than your main email address, to communicate with people you meet online.

Find out how to put caller ID blocker on your phone so that any calls you make cannot be traced to your name and number. Cell phones are also good to use.

Take time to get to know someone well before you agree to meet. Spend a couple of weeks at least in email and/or telephone communication. You will be impressed with how much you can find out about someone in just 2 weeks of writing or talking together.

Telephone conversations are a good way to sense someone’s personality much more thoroughly than writing. Our voices reveal much of our emotions and sensitivity through tone, volume, pitch, etc. Have you ever met someone whose laughter makes you want to laugh too? Now think of someone whose laughter grates on your nerves. Enough said.

If you find yourself falling in love too quickly, say after 2 emails; think carefully about your fantasies. Are they coloring your impression of this new person? Back off a little and relax.

There comes a time when you have got to take a chance and meet someone if they seem nice enough. Dating is actually for meeting people, not just talking a good story. Cyber-dating is only meant to be a prelude to the real thing. All the world is a stage; don’t waste your life waiting to go on.

When meeting on that first date:

For women who want to be safe on that first date there are a number of steps you can take. Don’t have him pick you up. Meet at a public place and have your own transportation. Tell a friend where you are going and ask them to call you later if you haven’t called them by a certain time.

Women, offer to pay or to pick up your share of the tab. This is polite anytime, we live in a world where men and women are supposed to be equal, act like it and maybe someday, at least in your relationships, it will be true.

Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Watch that tendency, if you find yourself going on and on, stop and ask your date about them. Listen to their answer and ask questions about that. A conversation should be a balance between both people giving and receiving information.

Remember all the usual manners that you were taught as a child, table manners, common courtesy, etc. If you don’t know what these are, get a copy of Emily Post or any other book about manners.

Do not go overboard, women sometimes feel uncomfortable when their date hurries to open the car door for them or insists on paying for a very expensive evening. Don’t bring a gift, overdress, or show up 30 minutes early, no matter how excited you are. Be yourself.

Be upbeat, even if you are disappointed. You may not have found a romance but perhaps you can still have a friend. After all, there was a reason you were initially interested in this person. Be considerate and enjoy the meeting as much as possible. If you feel that it was a definite downer, be tactful when turning down a second date. If your date doesn’t get the hint be firm but stay tactful.

Respect the other person’s feelings: If you are desperately lonely and your date was ‘acceptable’, don’t lead them on as a backup plan. Chances are that you will meet a number of non-soul-mates before the right one comes along. Treat everyone with respect and your self-respect will grow exponentially.

Whenever:

Ready? Before you begin that Internet search for love, ask yourself if you are emotionally prepared.

If you are recovering from a broken heart allow yourself to heal first. Don’t even bother with online or any dating until you are ready to see and know someone new. A good way to prepare yourself is to meet people as friends in the community. Help out with community projects, join a club or class, find a place to interact with other people without the emotional implications of dating.

If you are an Internet addict and your only intention is to write to loads of people but never actually meet any of them, admit it. Either, be brave with the intention to actually go out and meet other online daters or stick to the chat rooms, save your money while saving other peoples time, money and emotions.

If you are only looking for sex, be up front about it in your profile and join the web sites that cater to the sex seekers. It will be much simpler in the long run.

Set? Be safe and be aware. Take your time. Trust your intuition. If you are getting ‘red flags’ about that person you are communicating with, don’t set up any meetings before you talk to a friend, write in a journal and think carefully about it. There are predators out there. The vast majority of people online, as in all of life, are good-hearted and sincere, but there are always a few bad apples to beware of. As you consider opening your heart to someone, remember to open your eyes as well.

Above all, be yourself and be honest with yourself and others. That is what relating is all about, whether you do it on a computer, telephone or face to face. The more you act like yourself, the more you will attract people that will like and appreciate the real you. You may also discover that you will feel better about yourself as a person. Honesty is a win-win-win situation.

Go! With that said, take some chances. The search for love and relationship can be difficult enough in this hectic age. The Internet is a wide-open place with lots of opportunities; take advantage of it. If you use common sense and the advice offered here, you might find much more than you ever expected or hoped for. Good things do happen so get out there and make them happen for you.